Variable Undefined

by Ultraklystron

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/
1.
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03:15
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01:39
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02:14
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about

I was totally gonna overthink this record, then I realized there's no time like the present. I can always make another one.

credits

released November 27, 2019

Written, performed, recorded, mixed and produced by Karl Olson aka Ultraklystron.

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about

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Ultraklystron Victoria, British Columbia

I make
Anime Rap,
Drum n' Bass,
Trap,
Vaporwave,
Nerdcore,
Beat Tapes
& more.

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Track Name: Friends
ch.
no new friends
and no old friends
in my feelings so alone
cannot pretend

no new friends
and no old friends
in my feelings so alone
cannot pretend

let me go to
swim across the river
cold as winter
but I never shiver

let me go to
swim across the river
cold as winter
but I never shiver

v1.
got out of the city in the nick of time
didn't fit me, feeling like it's quitting time
but still I'm catching losses out on either side
all these human sacrifices make me wanna cry

got everything but still feeling unfulfilled
cause things don't matter the drama still spills
and I'm not talking bout all of the gossip news
closest people are the ones that I tend to lose

ooh... not supposed to talk about that
gotta keep it closed and maybe walk around that
but I don't know why, I can never speak directly
but put it in verse, and suddenly it don't effect me

wait a minute, chotto matte a second
I've gotten off topic, a little aside I recon
so let me get back to what I'll never get back
it doesn't matter how I rap, I cannot effect that

v2.
no support without emotional extortion
despite privilege it's blown out of proportion
no love, just equivalent exchanges
despite loss these feelings stay deranged

everything already decays rapidly
yet people want me to throw more out vapidly
left asking, is this really how it had to be
so many never coming back, still they're mad at me

forget y'all, feeling yeezy appalled
but I don't have the racks to throw around at the mall
I'm not out to live a life that's parodied
guess I want more than consumer therapy

that's a moment of clarity, no vvs
I just miss my friends from the bbs
guess I'm trying to learn like it's pbs
because so much is gone that I'm needy yes
Track Name: Subtext
v1.
returned again with at least another ten flows
but if I'm a rap god I'm Akane Shinjo
messy high school room stacked with garbage
only make tragedies though we are artists

lacking the emotions to properly like you
broke brain children spawning nothing but Kaiju
busted specs worn despite any resets
fill the spaces in with things we don't need yet

a catchment that shows a lack of detachment
clinging to a past though we can't get back then
and hope we find a path before the track ends
or wipe it from existence like all those track friends

as we made the villains that rebuild and destroy
we made the heroes who defeat and deploy
we make giant mecha fight terrible lizards
while the ground shudders an unbearable shiver

ch. (x2)
can't read emotions
can't grasp the subtext
can't make connections
can't know a love yet

v2.
calibur could never be a match for a blade
decisions made to implode rather than save
despite the action from those we wished loved us
the plans dreamed up all implode luckless

can't help but let the condescension start
too late now for sorries and redemption arcs
made those who go past our specification
and greet that with hatred instead of elation

those who would seek to find higher elevations
we drag them all down, keep them under our station
and feign innocence that slides to disgust
gaslights dimmed to ensure a distrust

do it all for all people barring anyone close
every other audience is getting the most
try to deny the fear, but frankly these folks
have seen through the mirrors, all the mist & the smoke
Track Name: Bell Del Fiend
ch.
Can only assume that hell dreamed it
Wish I didn't know who Belle Delphine is
Stream chasers that only think with their penis
Stalking anyone willing to be their Venus

I'm not here to knock the work
Just those obsessed all over the Earth, yeah
Pity that one's greatest worth
Is held in the hand of internet jerks, yeah

v.
Probably could not deny if the math offered
The chance to make bank by selling the bath water
Embrace meme hood or maybe just die tryin
But to ignore the chance is really to die cryin'

Break boys or end up a broke toy with no Buzz
If Woody is the viewer then Peeps how you show love
Or else forget fame if you can't stand the fortune
The point'll be moot the first second you're borin'

But this decision shouldn't even have to be made
People oughta be respectful of those making their way
People shouldn't have to tap thirsts just quench their's
Thoughts get bought up that shoulda stayed on the bench there

And as long the merch moves I could never deny
The opportunity to find a way to survive
Can't hate player one for trying to capitalize
But the audience shouldn't force it into a life
Track Name: Haunting Me
ch.
I'm never alone
You're haunting me
All at my side
Won't let me be

So I'll stay around
While all you leave
My tepid strides
Somehow more free

v1.
strength in inexperience
never known delirium
couldn't know the consequence
would leave me the imperium

anxiously held from mistakes
yet slipped past the barricades
never had a form to break
yet still had a hand to play


v2.
walking on while others left
sometimes feeling reticent
no time to remain bereft
some how it's so innocent

knowing when I hold the line
hands recall a guided path
mea culpas all the time
staying is worth all the wrath
Track Name: Laced Up
v1.
I'm in action,
Looking for endless distraction
Broken fractions
Overcome dissatisfaction

What's the use
Unlived lives from unloved truths
Blow a fuse
Can't ignore all the abuse

Anti-climax
Things could change but no one tries that
Feel side-tracked
Pathway's dark yet most deny that

cha. (x2)
Laced up / Locked down
Flower extracts call out
Face up / Blocked now
Power exacts fall out

chb.
so what...
will...
it...
be now

v2.
Easy conflict
Night terrors can't see beyond it
Now beyond sick
Perfect lives yet still don't want it

Tropes are heart break
Misdirections are a head fake
Stale hard cake
Swallow it despite the lead taste

Rather shimmer
But that must remain more inner
Frozen dinner
Watch as all the lights get dimmer
Track Name: Rapid Eye
v1.
dreams don't give satisfaction
dreamt I chilled with brockhampton
dreamt I once shared a stage
with kanye west and lupe

manga dreams, i had a few
was tenchi, was a mew mew
caught a mewtwo and a mew too
but it's all dreams, so it's not true

was told my goals were just nonsense
had to use my com-mon sense
tried to chill yet beyond tense
all because of subconscious

forget dreams like memories
blending facts with reveries
apparently that betters me
more than chasing and getting free

ch. (x2)
i don't need that rapid eye
mind is playing vapid lies
rather have some daily gaps
than artificial recaps

v2.
used to write my nocturnal
put it into school journals
never meant for alignment
just did it for assignments

do not care for refinement
do not care what the signs meant
heart hard with a carapace
no playing self-therapist

standing at broken bridges
waiting to make decisions
I don't call that a vision
won't add it to my mission

I'm just being honest
sorry if it seems noxious
I am just being cautious
pretending that I forgot it
Track Name: Outcomes
v1.
this nostalgia's gonna bury him
small door to the imaginarium
recollection here to carry him
innocent times like a cherry whim
tired cause the memories won't go away
cookie scented manga near a small cafe
munchin' stale pocky, sippin' flat ramune
weird flex but okay in the right cosplay

metro manga tastes since day one
but only in dreams knew how to play son
never thought he'd ever find a Caroline
didn't think he'd find a parallel line
roll pair a dice and got paradise kissed
but atelier days are still a life missed
sewing machine dreams and flashbulbs
burned down the candle to an ash nub

ch. (x2)
best of all the outcomes
can leave you at the end still without one

v2.
second childhood lived so sweetly
trying mild goods so neatly
never getting lit, never getting high
never being cold, getting over shy
holding to stricter standards
dreaming of weekends with lanyards
tried to keep the anxiety at bay
rather than let it loose to hold back and betray

but the past is just the past ah it was what it was
and he can't pretend that now he don't love
writing perfect beats with the lyrics to match
on a pocket computer making effortless tracks
time to let it go, though first he says sorry
thanks to his memories, mental konmari
time to find a new path, and no longer be coy
gotta lust for this life, and once again spark joy
Track Name: Retiree
ch a. (x2)
I'm out,
Retiring from fandoms
Too old to be random
Long past lookin' handsome

I'm out,
Forgetting all these fictions
Used to be addictions
On to other missions

v1.
feeling too old for cons
youth exited and gone
tried to play ddr
my legs didn't go far
well they tried their best
still copped d's & f's
couldn't hit the right notes
so I picked up my coat

dealers room was up next
dreamed of blowing a check
but nothing there sparked joy
guess I'm over those ploys
even in den den town
feel like I might drown
cause I'm so out of phase
guess I'm over those days

v2.
switch it up looked at the stores
Americamura adores
but the fashion underscored
I'm heading out to the door
never was that predisposed
to look good in fashionable clothes
cosplay drips also a bust
so I must do what I must

figurines long packed away
blu-rays now never replayed
manga that's never reread
time to put that all to bed
put it all up on ebay
try to redeem what I paid
but really I'll never let go
I'll just keep it all on the low
Track Name: Gaming In Kyoto
v1.
When it comes to cons, I no longer travel far
Yet I chill with my otaku in Kyoto game bars
Making friends that I only have for one night
But it's an experience that stays past the flight

Don't be tripping man; I'm still not sipping
'Cept on calpico and Coke, ice cold glass dripping
Cosplay servers keep the clientele enthralled
Figurines gold, kept behind glass walls

Wife is on one side, waifu on the same side
Yeah I keep it all together, cause it's true otaku life
No time to mope about abstract pains
Inflicted by the outside no I'm here to game

Down to play werewolf, cards against humanity
If that is too basic, then suggest candidly
Table top to cabinets, consoles to mobege
I'm just here to cut loose, all I wanna do is play

ch. x2
Wouldn't know it from just one glance
It's a party through we don't dance
Everything coming down to chance
Slice of heaven Game Bar Clantz

v2.
Don't get it wrong, hey I ain't talkin' bout shippin
This is just another slice of that otaku livin
Idol John Galt I'm the man that loves lives
In an old capital where modern life thrives

I already spent all day running in arcades
Where bemani games sap my energy away
But I'm not looking to return home soon
So I'd rather stay out then see hotel rooms

Down to make connections, get over my tensions
Yeah I want the real over scrolling through my mentions
Passion for competition breaks walls
Once the laughter starts, smile never once falls

Though it comes to close as we finish campaigns
And I know that too soon I'll be back on a plane
Then another then another and then back home again
But in the moment I love it, yeah that never will change
Track Name: Shadows Of My Heart
ch. (x2)
step inside the shadows of my heart
see it through right through the dark
it's just the beginning, it's a start
it's a start

v1.
know it's beyond any reason
truly the most savage season
lack anything to believe in
emotions taunting and teasin'

panic attackin not breathin'
innocence lost got me grievin'
warmth ends up very decievin'
everything seems so indecent

try to lay everything bare then
grievences ready for airin'
but we're too easily scarin'
not death defyin' or darin'

but now it's for time declarin'
every secret to be shared then
makin' the opaque transparent
organize all your affairs then...

v2.
feeling unsure of the future
trying to be a seducer
club only made up of losers
really a joke with no humor

only connect through computers
cannot escape these accusers
everyone circulates rumors
snooper boomers in the boudoir

all that they want are examples
sacrifices for the bramble
they do not care who they strangle
they're just distressin' the damsels

youth has them easily rankled
because their now is a shambles
they want us all disentangled
but we're ready to be vandals