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lyrics

Internet
by Karl Olson

ch.
The Net's A Comedy Goldmine
But I'm trying to find
Parts for my Vic-20
The Net's A Infinite Wasteland
Lacking good taste and
It can get so scummy
The Net Can Be So Precarious
Yet So hilarious
That doesn't concern me
The Net has princes deposed
And many pirated shows
And spyware just to burn thee

v1.
Well, wait that's a falsehood / I own no such computer
But I own a TRS-80 / Just looking for a suitor
Some one to purchase it / perhaps via ebay
I'll auction it along side / the piles of anime
Sent to me by companies / and of shows I didn't like
And I'll Sell it all / because some guy stole my bike
No seriously it was snatched / from beneath my front porch
So I need to get a new ride / preferably one that can scorch
Maybe a Unit Zero One / Or An R X Seven Eight
They're both emo kid powered / so on that note I'm great
Driven by bishonen guys / with twinkles in their eyes /
with no shonen-ai / they'll ride or die / with a of side fries


v2.
I can derail threads/like Amtrak derails trains
Step up on my internet / I moderate with no pain
But Your ships and your pairings / are driving me insane
If you don't stop I'll delete you / like Serial Experiments Lain
I'll scratch you like a record / Decode you like a D V D
Throw tomatoes like a heckler / from the I M D B
Put you on a reality show / for Must See T V
Now for here's a cease and desist letter/ from N B C
Now I'm kidding about that / it's just some irritated humor
I've got a much more polite way / of dealing with net tumors
If you're breaking the rules of the board / I'll drop the ban hammer
So don't flame, troll or curse / and definitely don't be a spammer

credits

from Opensource Lyricist, released November 27, 2007
Written, performed, recorded, mixed and produced by Karl Olson. Copyright 2007 Karl Olson.

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